Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Randomize