I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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