I'm jealous of your bromance
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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