WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
