I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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