I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
this hospital has no fireball
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Randomize
