im drinking this country out of the recession.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
What a dumb baby whore.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Randomize
