Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
