I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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