Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
