marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
