She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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