even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Do vagina's smell?
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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