and she was petting her beer can
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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