i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
