You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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