That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
