i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Randomize