so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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