You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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