My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Randomize
