Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize