I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
