Midget sex pt 2 tonight
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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