Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize