It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
You need a sexual gate keeper
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Randomize
