I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
oh god the rape fog is back!
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I think i got beer on your cat.
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