I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Are we still banned from the library?
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
