Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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