i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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