i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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