You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
We're not piercing ourselves today.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
