I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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