so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
