that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
Four minutes until I can fart!
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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