drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
