It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
