i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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