you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I love you. Go after that dick
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize
