butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
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