whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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