Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
do herpes really smell.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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