so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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