the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Randomize
