What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
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