try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
my vag is so smooth its legendary
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
my god I love twenty year old dicks
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
