Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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