I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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