did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize