i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize