Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
